What do you feel?

Dear Son,

What do you feel when you see mom & dad go to office everyday and left you with si mba? I often see you cry when we're about to go..My heart is also cry..I wish I could stay with you..play with you..read a book for you..feed you..

But since life is not gonna give us everything for free, mom&dad have to fight for our life. We have to work to ensure that our mortgage being paid. We have to work for your education. We have to save money for mom&dad's old days so we won't be your burden. We have to save money for our holiday :)

When people know that I'm a working mom, some of them said "Terus..anak lo ditinggal?" At 1st, I feel ashamed that I left my son at home. That I couldn't stay at home for taking care of my own son. But..hey..every family has a different condition. Then..are you gonna help us to pay our bills, people?

One think for sure, whenever I could, I'll try to always be with you. This is not a promise. This is my commitment. I want to be your best friend whenever you need me, wherever you need me. I want to be parents who guide you. I want you to trust me for everything.

This is just my notes about what I feel..looks like a random one huh. Because I'm missing you, Boy. So much.

-Bali, 24th October 2013 *a week when I couldn't be with you-